More Sex Questions

“Mommy, what does Extra Virgin mean?  How can you be Extra Virgin?  Does that mean you aren’t even horny?” my son asked me this morning as I was drinking my coffee.  As my morning coffee sprayed the kitchen table and I burst out laughing, I tried to think of an answer.  I don’t remember seeing that question in my “Sex Talk for Dummies” book.  What questions are your children asking you?

It Must Be Spring!

Before I had time to finish my coffee this morning, my thoughts were interrupted by the squeals of my son.  “Look at the squirrels!” he shouted.  “Hee, hee, they’re humping,” he shrieked with joy.  Everyone at the table turned to watch the Wild Kingdom show on our deck.  Hoping to avoid too many questions, I replied “Turn around and eat your breakfast. You need to get ready for school.”

After finishing his next bite of breakfast, my son blurted out “I hope they used a condom. I wouldn’t want the squirrel to get a STD.”  Stunned that my 11-year-old would talk about safe sex, I sat quietly for a moment like a deer in the headlights of a car.  “That’s my tax dollars at work in the school Health Class,” I thought to myself.  Then, to end this very uncomfortable conversation, I responded “That’s good thinking, but I think they are trying to make babies.  We will see baby squirrels in the yard soon.”  He was so excited and exclaimed “I want a baby squirrel.  They’re so cute!”  Now distracted by thoughts of cute baby squirrels in his yard, he happily finished his breakfast.  What are your signs of Spring?